Vive le Chocolat

Chocolate is my favorite food group. I would agree that I am a true chocoholic. Chocolate is a fruit but in my opinion it deserves to be its own group. There is only one reason to get out of bed.  Someone once told me they have to reward them selves for getting out of bed so they had a piece of chocolate. This is my kind of morning reward. My favorite forms of chocolate are, hot chocolate, chocolate muffin, chocolate pancakes, chocolate bagels, chocolate cheesecake, chocolate cake, brownies, chocolate cookies, fruit dipped in chocolate, Rocky Road  ice cream, chocolate cookies and “Symphony bars”. My favorite movie is of course “Chocolat” Basically anything chocolate.

 In memory of my brother who died in 2012. He loved chocolate. dennsis raceThis is a picture of him at the end of a 200 mile bike race from Logan UT to Jackson Hole WY.

Chocolate milk was his favorite snack with chocolate chip cookies of course.

This was served at his memorial.

My brother died after a long fight with depression. He is missed.

Chocolate Milk a la Dennis

Chocolate ‘R’ US  This is written in his words

1 really big glass
Ice cold milk
Hershey’s cocoa mix (no substitutes)
Semi sweet chocolate chips

Pour milk in glass, add a handful of chocolate chips. Add a couple or 3 big spoonfuls of Hershey’s mix. Stir. Pick chocolate chips out with a spoon and chew. Wash ’em down with chocolate milk. (Note: for the supreme effect swish the chocolate milk around in your mouth and let it rest on your tongue for an instant before swallowing).


A side note on depression. Living with depression can at times seem like a hopeless task. I have suffered with it for 24 years. Every day I have to fight my depression. It is not easy. I have spent years locked in my house because my depression would not let me leave. I live with severe paranoia and thoughts of suicide daily. It is only by the grace of God and the faith and prayers of my family and friends that I have survived. My dear brother did not survive. He is my inspiration to find a reason to live.

My tools for surviving are: A supportive medical doctor who believes my symptoms are real. Seeing a psychiatrist who has more knowledge on medicines available. A tireless psychologist with a doctorate who does not give up on me when I give up on myself. I have to take my medicine everyday without fail. I don’t enjoy it, without it I will die. Utilizing other homeopathic remedies.Essential oils, herbal supplements, acupuncture. My children who have been raised by a depressed mother who love me and call me, when I bury myself in my misery, they pull me out. My dear sweet 76 year old mother, who has lived with a depressed husband, a son, a daughter and grandchildren. She has never given up on any of us. My siblings who tirelessly pray for me, and call me when I don’t call them. My loving heavenly father and the atonement of my Savior, for giving me the strength to live and saving me from myself, when I wanted only to return to them. This blog is a coping method to release some of my pain, by offering my talents to the world.

If you or someone you love is suffering. Please get help today. I have lost years to this disease. We lost my brother to this disease. I pray you get help today and get your life back. If you are a danger to yourself, call someone! If you need to go to the hospital GO! It will change your life!

                                     There is a way out
Here is a helpful website
5 ways to fight depression
5 Ways to Fight Depression

Contact your local NAMI they can put you in touch with local support groups.
Call your local county or state mental health department. They offer counseling and Dr. services at low costs.

There is help, there is hope. There is a way out to a happier life.